More bullying, another death

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http://news.yahoo.com/staten-island-teen-bullied-taking-her-life-161151417.html

Do visit the Yahoo! link above for the whole story.

Here's another link - http://www.silive.com/eastshore/index.ssf/2012/01/relatives_of_amanda_cummings_s.html

I wrote about bullying some time last year. It's another girl this time and by the looks of it, felt desperate enough to end her very worthy life. No joys of growing up, rites of passage, family unions or anything. The potential for all those moments faded before the fact that she could not deal with cruelty in the here and now. A boy-friend who formed her world and the insults from other girls that filled her world. A teenager's natural angst amplified by careless words and actions.

pic credit - Salvatore Vuono; freedigitalphotos.net
I read that Amanda Cummings' mother knew and wanted to help. But she was afraid of being picked on even more. Those bullies must feel awfully empowered. Now that they've pushed one over the edge, and the fun's gone (except for, I believe, constantly posting terrible messages to her FB profile), they're going to be looking for another one. Another slightly unsure, hopeful and trusting peer.

There's evidently no remorse. Or perhaps, they're covering up their guilt with a ton of bluster. And I'm pretty sure the adults in their miserable lives tell them that the poor girl who took her life was at fault. For not fighting back/being too weak...what have you.

What gives them such power over another human being? This child took a final step. And irreversible step. I cannot imagine what her family must feel. And ofcourse, in hindsight, any number of options would seem like appropriate solutions - going to the authorities in school/law enforcement/even getting Amanda out of there. Anything but this. They knew about it, but respected the child's boundaries.

It's always been there, the urge to put down weak/different people . The cruel extremes are new and more potent than ever. I could go on talking about societal ills that contribute to the mindset of these children. It can't be anything you haven't heard before.

But they're a bulk of the issue. The issue of leaving tender lives at the mercy of others' dark leanings.

There has to be a system in place...a way to change this. A way to make children focus on what matters without needing to conform within an inch of their lives. Look at the girl's picture, the guarded smile, and the wary eyes.

Why does she need to conform or else?!

What was it, within her, that craved for acceptance? That too, with such a miserable group of girls?

I wish there could be some legislation regarding this. Take away the chance for a future from the bullies.

While this child's actions were her own, and extreme, anyone that pushed her to this extent needs to be brought to book.

Let it go on their records. Just like any other offense. Only, make it severe. Let any institution that they attend be aware of their part in the end of a young life, and make their choices accordingly. Let every work place that they ever attend know about it.

The bullies and their stupidly supportive families need to feel it where it'll hurt. Where they will never forget it and never repeat their actions. It needs to be a part of their future. 


The child who took her life, lost her future too, after all. So did her family. Everyone's futures changed in that drastic moment.




pic link - http://www.freedigitalphotos.net/images/view_photog.php?photogid=659

Comments

  1. This story is so, so sad. I don't know what the answers are, but I do believe "kids" need to see the consequences of their actions. Sadly I know adults who still treat others this way, too. What a boring world this would be if we were all the same.

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  2. Hi Karen, I totally understand about the adults being that way. They must've started out that way too. It has to change, and yet, it seems with everything else going on in the world, this can't be a priority. I really think it has to be done at an individual/group level. People getting together and refusing to back down. Good to see you here, thanks for stopping by!

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  3. You are right that bullying has to be handled on a small group level. My students know that I will not accept "picking on" other students AT ALL in my classroom. They walk in saying, "Leave the drama outside" because they hear me say it so often. At least for that hour each student is equal to the other, and they all know I care about them enough to make them behave.

    I'm sorry I'm not around as often as I would like. I'm glad I had a chance to stop by!

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  4. That's great Karen. They get an instant indication of what is unacceptable, within and without the classroom.
    I can imagine that you handle a lot, so don't worry about it; I'm just glad to see you :-) Will stop by your blog too.

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